OMFG! I just opened mine eyes, and lo! I have not updated this since the sun was actually shining in Melbourne… You would not believe the amount of people that are totally stalking me. I hope they bring chocolate!.

I am lost in a sea of pseudo-olde-english with discovering time doesn’t stand still, learning to fart the theme to neighbours, just generally being not online in order to anyone unfortunate to cross my path, my day pisses me off from the moment my children manage to unlock my bedroom door and use me as a jumping castle to I am begging my kid to go to sleep or so help me God that kid will be decorating my wall, ‘Duct tape still life’. I am convinced that I absolutely deserve this after all my hard work. and that I can take that big badge off my head that says bad mother.

I swear on the bones of my ancestors I will make more of an effort to blog more often until the nice men in the white coats come back. You wanna test me? What do you mean you don’t believe me?.

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